Posted - Jan 06 2004 : 18:13:05 First Doctor's visit today. I have to admit I'm a little nervous. Having age as a consideration in pregnancy is something I've never had to think about before - or ever thought I'd have to!
Anyway, the past month has been a fairly huge rollercoaster ride. I've been all over the place with my emotions and health and thoughts about this baby.
There's been not one day when I haven't felt like throwing up. From the moment I put my feet on the floor in the morning to the time I lay down at night to go to sleep, I feel sick. Many days I actually am sick. My nose is extremely sensitive and can pick up all sorts of smells. As a result my stomach picks up on all the disgusting ones and completely upheaves it! YUK YUK YUK!
My husband, bless his little cotton socks, had enough bravery to inform me that there's a school of thought from some doctors that suggests morning sickness is all in the mind, that I could beat it if my mind was strong enough! Of course, his mind is now considering all manner of consequences for speaking without consulting me first!
There's a lot of attention that comes with being pregnant. I feel like I don't have the energy to deal with at times. I'm so tired all the time. This past week has been a little better but previously I just wanted to curl up in bed and sleep away the whole day. Feeling sick all day is taking it's toll too. I'm trying not to complain too much, just enough to ensure that my son and husband never forget what a delicate state I'm in and fetch me ice cream whenever I request it! Naughty I know, but oh well.
Christmas and New Year were very different. Needless to say I was designated driver - Everywhere! Actually I enjoyed not drinking. I enjoyed the opportunity to watch my loved ones have way too much "festive spirit" and look like a bunch of drunken monkies. (Is that how you spell monkies? Looks wrong.) In the future I'll have plenty of bargaining power. "Remember last Christmas when you did............." Bound to be worth something.
There was one very down point for me on Christmas day. My husband's cousin has just had a little boy who's a gorgeous little thing. We don't see them often and it was the first time I had seen the little baby. I asked what she had named him and she told me the same name that I had picked out for our baby if it happens to be a boy. I was very upset. I was so upset I cried. Isn't that totally irrational? My hormones must have been playing havoc that day. Isn't it silly to be so upset that someone else has chosen the same name for their baby? I guess it's not that it was anyone - I don't think that would bother me too much, it's because it's in the same family. Now, if I name my baby boy 'Malachi', then everyone will think I've copied my husband's cousin. Isn't that stupid? I don't know of anywhere where it's written "Thou shalt not name your child the same as other family members" I still feel weird though. It's like it's an unspoken rule forbidding certain behaviours and enforcing others. Like where is it written that upon learning a woman is pregnant, all people regardless of their relationship to the new mother, can pat her tummy? Why do they have to touch? I find it hilarious. It bothers me sometimes, like the time I'd eaten too much at a restaurant and had to undo my jeans button only to bump into some friends who then proceeded to pat my tummy and discover I "was already getting fat. You'll have to watch those kilo's Lisa, we don't want to have to wheel you out of the house." I wanted to scratch their eyes out! Count to ten Lisa, count to ten.
So today is the doctors appointment. I'm anxious about the tests I want to have. I know they can be quite invasive and there's a small chance of losing the baby. I don't want to lose the baby. I'm so happy about being pregnant. Admittedly I wasn't sure at first, but now I'm over the moon. I don't want to mess it up but I don't want to forgo the tests either. I've booked a double appointment with my doctor so I can discuss everything. My husband is coming with me too. He just wants to find out how to stop me feeling sick! hahaha He's afraid for his life.